Weekly Gratitude

 I am going to post my weekly gratitude here so I can update through the week and whatever I have posted will automatically post on Saturday mornings.  

I have a grateful heart for:

Social Media

Getting to keep up with Serena and her shenanigans is great.  Not sure what my mom did back in the day when my sister went away.  

Starbucks Iced Coffee

enough said.  no starbucks near by but I have some from the grocery store and it hits the spot on a Monday morning. 

Amazon Echo or Any Video Chat

I figured out that I can video chat her with the Echo Show and cook dinner at the same time. 

Three hour phone conversations with my stepmom

I have not talked to her in forever.  We both laughed so hard.  

Dinner with my brother and niece

I love my siblings and love when I get to spend time with them. 

Starbucks Fall Flavors   

Two reasons.  Salted Caramel Mocha and CHRISTMAS IS COMING (WHITE PEPPERMINT MOCHA)

Facebook Memories

Monica's bachelorette party.  2019 family cruise.  lots of fun memories

A good dentist

I have avoided the dentist like the plague for years and my teeth show it.  However, I have started going to an awesome dentist and little by little I am getting a smile I am proud of

A patient husband

We have conflicting schedules and I tend to handle things not the way he would.  It causes chaos sometimes.  

Close knit family

I look forward to our group messages.  planned outings and spur of the moment fire side drinks.

Single serve wine bottles

no explanation needed.  

Dual Dental Coverage

 I have been working on my smile...  :)  it is expensive.  However I was pleasantly surprised when I paid $165 for a consultation and root canal and got $145 back in the mail.  Win!

My daughter being 2 hours away

She is close enough for a quick meal visit but far enough she won't come home all the time.  

My parents

They will do anything for their kids.

Family Dynamic

Our family dynamic has changed again.  We have always done things kind of differently.  We had our oldest before marriage.  We got married, bought a house, and added our second child.  When I had our daughter I always imagined that we would have kids close together but in reality, we were not ready for this, and by the time we were ready and had our second child our kids were 7(ish) years apart.  People thought we were crazy.  People thought our kids wouldn't be close.  People thought that it would not work out.  Having kids with a big age gap worked for our family.  The kids obviously still fight like siblings fight but they are close.  Our daughter has taken care of her brother while we work and overall just rocked the big sister status.  

So now with our daughter gone, we are doing the only child thing again and our son is kind of lost.  He is used to his sister being here to not only do the chores but she is who he confides the most stuff to.  

He seems to be adjusting pretty well though.  People were right.  Kids are resilient.  

Nothing but time

 Since we are trying not to do too much other than work, grocery shopping and the occasional meal out I have a lot of time to study for my series 7.  I am actually following the plan set out by Kaplan and doing their calendar.  By the schedule, I have set out for myself (starting today and ending October 12th).  I only need to devote about 1 hour and 49 minutes a day.  So for two hours.  That is doable.  On weekends it allows me to have time for family but I can also do more if I know I have a hectic week coming up and weekdays I can easily devote two hours a night after work and dinner.  

I have lost count on how many times I attempted this test.  To be honest it is an alarmingly high amount of attempts.  I was completing my bachelor's degree for most of those attempts and I do not recommend doing that.  I was forced into a 6 month sabbatical after my last attempt.  My window opened up in August and is close in December.  

My plan is to finish the materials using the calendar method in Kaplan's website.  I will finish my materials on October 12th.  Take an online class the 13-15th and test on the 28th.  If I fail, I will have between November 29th and December 31st to retake it.  That is when my Kaplan materials expire.  When I finish this round, I will have my Series 66 to take.  

My goal is to finish my Series 7 by the end of the year.  Completely doable right?  I mean I cannot do anything else so...

edited:  by time this posts, I will have 5 days down...I wrote this on day 1 (Sunday).  

Junior High Pandemic Schooling

 I have talked about sending a kid to college during a pandemic.  But as most people know we have two kids in very different parts of their life.  Our son is in junior high.  Things are different.  He like everyone else missed the last 3 months of school last year.  However, he had the luxury of having a sister take care of him while mom and dad worked.  Doing remote learning with very little preparation was a struggle, but having a sister home was helpful.  Especially a sister who knew common core math.  

Now as we face a new school year I had contemplated changing his schools to the private school but had reservations about how this would affect him socially.  He already struggles making friends at his current school that he has gone to since pre-k so I could not imagine such a big change during junior high.  We decided not to judge his current school on the lack of prep time last school year and hope that this year would be better. 

We set out to start school but the Friday before we were notified that break was extended two more weeks with the hope that our cases would go down in our county.  If not, once this two week buffer period was up, we would start remote learning.  

Remote learning is going to be different.  He gets a Chromebook this year which should help as last year he used his sister's device or mine.  However, I am nervous has to how the instruction will be taking on and pray that there will be zoom instruction and a lot more guidance than last year.  He needs more than two full-time work outside the home parents can provide.  

So I pray for grace and patience this school year for both my son and me. 

Life update - college covid style

 She has been at school for 7 days now.  We left her 6 days ago.  She had a rough patch with trying to do band and not feeling like she fit in but she has overcome that.  She is still in constant communication with us.  Not sure how much of that is being homesick, how much is because she has the time and how much is just habit.  I have been trying to take her lead and not nag her too much.  

There has been a lot of communication this week just with changes to her schedule and class formats.  Her school does this cool thing where books are $9.95/credit hour and included in the tuition.  However, with many classes moving to an online or hybrid format she has had to purchase books.  The most expensive being $110 so far.  Totaling $200 so far for three books.  

Going to school during a pandemic is different.  However, I think her school has done an excellent job of trying to maintain some normalcy (responsibly).  I know they seem to be getting a lot of flack from their community but the students seem to be responsible (for now).  They did grab and go craft kits, movies under the stars and glow bingo.  All socially distanced.  

Serena has met some new friends and put herself out there.  I was worried with going to school with her grade school bestie she would navigate to the known to avoid the unknown.  However, tonight her bestie was not up for the movie and she put herself out there and found people to go with.  Even though they restarted the moving about half a dozen times to get the closed captioning to work she seemed to enjoy it.  She learned some valuable lessons -- use the bathroom first and bring bug spray (which she has in her room).  

She has ventured to her new bank twice, done laundry and dishes and walmart twice (once for groceries and once for a necessary cord to get her printer to connect).  She seems to be figuring things out and I am super proud of her for that.  

Subscription Boxes

 The amount of subscription boxes available is outrageous.  I always see Fatfitfun which is about $40-50 a month and Causebox always floats on my feed.  Those are not in my price range of what I would want to spend every month.  

I have considered sending her Ipsy, Birchbox, Casely or Succulent Studio.  Those are all under $20 a month.  

Someone recommended boxycharm which is midline between FFF and the cheaper boxes.  

I have not decided on one yet and I do not plan on doing 12 months.  I might do 3 months - September, October and November then maybe February, March, April.  I am leaning towards succulents and I kind of like the case one.  or succulents and Ipsy.  

Looking for suggestions.  I really do not want to spend more than $20 a month.  Not looking to break the bank but ways for her to get fun and functional mail while away.  She loves succulents and has joked about becoming the crazy plant lady from tik tok.  I guess this is a set up from the crazy unmarried cat lady she has aspired to be.  A husband and kids do not fit in her plan (for now).  

Care Packages

 So I sent off my first care package to her in college.  I cannot wait to send more but will be trying to limit them to once a quarter.  I sent her a 3/4 zip shirt with her school logo on it.  She knew she was getting this.  Just it was received after she left.  I sent her some pistachios in honor of grandpa Jim whose birthday is on the 22nd.  I sent her some Mio drops for her water.  Some stamps because she brought note cards to send people thank yous, notes, etc.  Some colored pencils for the coloring book she brought.  3 small decorative pumpkins.  Some gel clings for Halloween.  She already had some fall ones but couldn't resist the Halloween ones.  Some Halloween garland and fall and Halloween string lights.  I also sent several inspirational cards that she can open on days that she needs a pick me up or misses home or just wants to for fun.  

I cannot wait to send her more.  What do you recommend sending in a care package?  I do not want to send a bunch of candy.  She is trying to not eat a lot of that.  

Finding their own way

Probably one of my biggest struggles as a parent is figuring out when to step up and help and when to let them fall.  Even with an 18 year old there is an overwhelming urge to want to fix things or make decisions for her.  I am learning that is not helping her and learning to take a step back.  

This first week has proven to challenge my ability to do this.  Serena was so excited when we left her on Monday.  She had a "free" day before starting band on Tuesday.  I talked to her Tuesday night she seemed a little off.  Wednesday night she was in a mood but also busy and mentioned she wanted to video chat her brother.  She was over band.  I could tell.  I told her to give it more time because it was new.  She was also having issues with her shin.  This is an ongoing issue she had in high school band too with shin splints.  It was throbbing.  I encouraged her to keep up with it.  Thursday morning things kind of came to a head that she was most definitely done.  I wanted to encourage her to keep with it two weeks.  She didn't think she had that long to decide and ultimately her heart was not in it.  The band director tried talking to her but I think it was too late.  I cannot compliment this band director enough on how he handled the situation.  He talked to me (with her permission) and even though she dropped band he noticed her anxiety seemed to be at an all-time high and arranged for various people to check on her from the band.  Maybe she will join again one day but right now it is not for her.  I know it is important for her to be involved not only to keep her occupied and reduce her homesick feeling but also important for med school applications but I also do not want her to be miserable.  Starting next week she is going to have a pretty full schedule with 16 credit hours plus working.  however, within a few hours of dropping band, with the help of one of the people the band director connected her with, she found her way to the yearbook club and the newspaper. That made this mom heart happy.  

Talking to her since then I have noticed a difference in her demeanor and she seems happy and not as stressed.  Band is great but if it is not for her right now that is fine and I need to learn to let her make those decisions.  I was stuck between how much do I push or encourage her and how much do I let her make her own decision and learn from that.  I took a step back on this and realized she is so very capable to making her decisions and truly thinking things through.  

First Week

 The first week of what you probably ask.  This is the first week of our new routine and adventure.  We sent our oldest off to college on Sunday.  My husband and I took her, helped unload all of her belongings, and set up a few things for her before she decided she was ready to finish her room on her own because she wanted to know where everything is.  The logical part of me knew that was probably best but the sentimental part of me wished that I could have stayed to help or have gone back to see how it looks.  Although we have come a long way with technology and we can do video chat and do instant messages to each other.  

I thought ending my daughter's senior year during a pandemic was going to be the weirdest thing to go through but turns out sending her out into the world during one is scarier.  

Sending your kid to college during a pandemic means (for us) fewer visits to avoid carrying COVID back and forth between households.  It means not seeing her dorm room or other areas of the campus.  It means likely no parent weekend.  It means scheduled move-in times with smaller crowds.  That would seem like a benefit but it was odd.  Kind of a ghost town and just not what we imagined.  It means wearing a mask to move in.  It means not moving freely around the campus.  It meant once we left campus we could not come back.  It was weird.  

For her, it means wearing a mask whenever she is not in her room, and when she is in her room or another room with more than 1 person.  It means distanced dining.  It means hybrid, online, and very few in-person classes.  It means altered schedules, social distanced mixers and fun things being planned.  It means signing up for covid testing.  It means moving back home for 2 weeks if you are positive.  

But silver lining she is she is ON campus.  She has the opportunity to have a somewhat normal college experience.  She is making friendships and finding her way.